Heartbeat Lullabies
by Milk Moustache
Summary: Vignettes revolving around Howl, single father extraordinaire, and his adorable young charge, Markl. Nonlinear, fluffy plushie you wanna hate, romantic for the weirdos if you have X-ray vision?
1. Sappiness and Chipmunk Cheeks

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Howl's Moving Castle or any of its characters.

**A/N:** Ha ha, well... I suddenly felt the urge to try my hand at something cute and fluffy :D I know this is supposed to be pre-Sophie and based off the movie, but I accidentally mentioned Ms. Angorian in there Dx Anyway, I have no idea how old "Markl" was, so I settled with around 8 or 9. Interestingly enough, the inspiration for this was "Super Bass" by Nicki Minaj, lol.

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><p>I<p>

It had never occurred to Markl that Howl's bedroom was a sort of foreign land until he found himself scampering inside, shivering in the aftershocks of a horrid nightmare he had forgotten. Nonetheless, he was here. Though it was clustered with all sorts of nifty bric-a-brac and whirling mobiles; bearing more resemblance to a jewelry box instead of an actual bedroom, it was also incredibly lonesome. Like a child had left their playthings and never returned. Howl lay in the vast bed, snoozing supine and unmoving even as the door creaked behind Markl who tip-toed to where Howl's limp hand and gave it yank.

"Nnn... Five... Tucksitoodles...t-to go..." Howl's muffled voice uttered. _What's a tucksitoodle?_ Markl wondered as Howl flopped onto his stomach with a blissful sigh. He had been dreaming of stacking blocks upon blocks of tucksitoodles in order to claim his Rapunzel: an incredibly ecstatic, love struck Ms. Angorian caged inside a silver clock tower laden with chorusing sparrows and yellow, flapping butterflies. Truly a dream only Howl would concoct.

Markl shook the bed slightly. "Howl," he whispered. "Howl, wake up, you lazy heart-muncher!" He tugged Howl's long ruby earring impatiently, finally able to wake his mentor. As he had expected, Howl was the type who greatly valued a full night's sleep, sans interruptions.

"And why the pressing need to wake me at _this_ hour?" Howl griped, his hand fumbling over to the stack of books in search of his alarm clock, but knocking a few peacock feathers out of his way and disturbing several spiders instead. _Right in the midst of sweeping Ms. Angorian away from her luxurious prison, for goodness' sake!_ His normally sleek, impeccable hair fanned into wisps that flowed down the back of his threadbare nightgown. Markl suddenly felt ashamed that he allowed his trivialities to becomea disturbance. _I didn't plan anything up till this point!_

Howl heaved himself into a seated position. With a soft click from the tassel above, the room was teeming with light again and Markl's teary cheeks were in clear view. Howl's expression softened. "Had a nightmare, did you?"

Markl nodded as Howl reached to swipe a thumb over his smudged cheeks. "Have any idea what it was about?"

"I think it was about that green slime you summoned the other day," Markl said with a forced smile. He hiccupped. It was terribly embarrassing to be reduced to a trembling child in place of the spunky wizard's apprentice Howl was used to. Feeling the awkward vibe between them, Howl waved it away with the coverlet.

"C'mon. I'll teach you a charm to dispel unpleasant dreams tomorrow. Until then you sleep with me." A welcoming smile accompanied his invitation. Markl, for one, could only soundlessly accept the outstretched hand and scrambled up.

"T-there's such a thing?" Markl asked, sitting on a misshapen stuffed cow next to Howl. Now that he was comfortable and no longer alone in the dark, he was at ease. Howl's presence was so gentle at the moment.

"Mm, what? Oh! Yes potions for every bloody thing you need, practically," Howl said, taking a pillow from under his bed and plumping it for Markl. "Now get some rest. Young men like us need beauty sleep!" Markl rolled his eyes.

Snuggled between the silky emerald sheets with only his eyes and feathered hair peeping above, Markl nodded to Howl to shut out the lamp.

"Howl, do you think of me as...a decent apprentice?"

"Decent? I'd give you more credit that. I owe you for all those times you had to escape without meals and stay home to cater to customers!" He laughed.

"That didn't really answer my question." He wriggled himself until he was completely submerged in sheets to mumble a barely audible 'good night'. However, Howl had different ideas and fetched him out like a lobster.

"No, no! Don't leave it at that, tell me what you meant to say. It doesn't matter how foolish you think it is, I want to know!" Markl's blush deepened and he shook his head as if he were trying to fling away that rosy pink color. "J-just that... Well, if you saw me as your son, is all. Not that you would, it's just...a possibility. That's all."

Markl shifted his view to where his fingers were twiddling. That confession felt worse than any begging he ever had to do. The light flickered on once more.

"Son?" Howl's glassy eyes brimmed with curiosity. His blonde hair tumbled from back to shoulder as he got uncomfortably close to Markl. It was briefly quiet as Howl let it sink in, but not much later the nerve-wracking pause gave way to laughter. Markl could have died.

"I know it's ridiculous! That was why I wanted to leave it at good night, but you wouldn't listen!" Now he folded his arms and harrumphed defiantly.

"Of course it isn't," Howl said, recovering from his outburst. "Actually, I suppose I somewhat do consider you my son. Though I must say, it may solely be your age. Most apprentices are well into their teens. But you've been here for quite some time, so who's to say it's not genuine, parental love? Feeding you... Teaching you... Providing a home for you..." Howl counted the reasons off his fingers offhandedly.

_Fool!_ Markl thought to himself. He knew it wasn't a good idea to ask, and look where it had led him! Howl didn't like to answer questions and if he did, he was never inclined to be straightforward in his responses.

The counting ceased and he heard the crinkling of linen sheets as Howl moved in and smoothed Markl's hair. The touch was affectionate. "Would you like to be my son, Markl?" Soft smile, deep gaze. "I wouldn't mind being your father. I'd _love_ to, actually. You need someone to be there for you, don't you?"

When Markl didn't answer, Howl peered at him in the eye. Markl nodded, ashamed. Whether Howl was joking or not wasn't a concern; he was clearly being serious.

"You see, that wasn't so hard!" Howl exclaimed merrily. In one fluid motion he had Markl propped atop his lap, hands in the boy's downy fringes and connected forehead to forehead like a lovesick child.

Markl didn't know what to say. He just knew that he felt unbelievably overjoyed. He had a father now. Not bound by contract of course, and with still more experienced to be gained, but a father figure in his life nonetheless.

"So does that make Calcifer my older brother?" He laughed in attempt to fend off further mushiness. Howl slid a hand through Markl's hair affectionately. "A brother hundreds of years older than you. Don't you think he'd be the grandfather?" said Howl sleepily.

"Mm... I wonder if he can hear us at this hour," Markl mumbled. He rubbed his drooping eyelids. He was beginning to feel rather tired, and Howl's gentle playing with his mousey hair did nothing to help.

Howl only smiled as he let Markl to slide comfortably between the covers. As he settled down, he wrapped the boys up in his arms like a pearl within an oyster.

"Good night." A kiss to the forehead and a turn of his head, and Howl was finally nestled in bed, with no qualms about what had happened.

Although there was no heartbeat to lull him to sleep, Markl nuzzled his soft cheek against Howl warmly, hiccupping one last time. Howl chuckled, tightening his embrace. Together they drifted into the warm summer night.


	2. Coquetry and the GreenEyed Monster

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Howl's Moving Castle or any of the characters. Boohoo.

**Warnings: **Slight OOCness

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><p>II<p>

Sunday is a difficult time to be out in Market Chipping, especially since today marked the end of a dismal week of heavy rain clouds, starless nights, and parades of slugs and worms. A flurry of shoppers bustled about Market Chipping; coins jingling as they circled shops and greeted friends. Couples bounced along the sun-kissed cobblestone, young women gossiped, and men accosted girls under the cover of a parasol. On the whole, it was a rather laid back and agreeable day.

Markl and Howl, however, were men on a mission. A mission to make an edible, homemade dinner that at least met the standards for the excuses sold in McFinnigan's. Markl bounced along the curb of the sidewalk lightheartedly, hand-in-hand with Howl who was inspecting their grocery list. What he _should_ have been doing was minding Markl's antics. A vexed middle-aged man guiding a carriage beside them did not fail to remind Howl of this, accentuating his rant with curses before he speeding off into the distance.

"People these days," Howl groused, pulling Markl by his side possessively. "Wouldn't stop to denounce every person in their path if one thing doesn't go to their liking! Buttered toast on the wrong side, I'll bet." But he did keep Markl at a closer distance.

The pair paused at a fish market. Markl held his breath as Howl tugged the reluctant youngster with him. The blonde flicked his attention from list to the barrel of fish chilled on a bed of murky ice. This he did every time they went shopping. Clothes were another matter. "How much a pound?" he asked the store-keeper.

"Twenty-one shillings. Freshly caught by my son this morning from the harbor."

"Howl, I don't like salmon!" Markl whispered.

"Herring then?" Howl looked over the next barrel of sulky fish with their mouths agape.

"No, I don't like herring either. Fish is disgusting." This time it reached the store-keeper.

"Nonsense, boy," the man replied with his hand mid-swipe from cleaning the scale-embellished counter top. "Don't you want to grow to be tall and strong like your father? They say fish brains make you smarter, too! With each one you eat, the bigger yours becomes!" This was stupid logic, of course, but Markl was too polite to say so.

"I'm smart enough" Markl protested, tightening his grip on Howl's hand. His cheeks flared as the store-keeper made up more excuses about the greatness of fish and all things pertaining to the sea. A hunched old woman and her husband watched with amusement.

"I hear that the kale round the corner sells for half the price," said the old woman, "and it's been proven to ward off bloating." She smiled as Howl took the opportunity to pull Markl with him into the sidewalk.

Along they tapped towards Main Street. "I didn't like that man," Markl piped as they dodged an onslaught of shoppers. They stopped to purchase pomegranates, tomatoes, and kale. He sent for Markl to buy a head of cabbage and a loaf of bread while he accosted a girl looking at a display of wedding cakes brandished behind a thick pane of glass.

"Now hurry along now while I chat," Howl whispered, shooing Markl to a particularly stuffy market a whole block down.

"But I don't have money!" It fell on deaf ears as Howl turned his attention to the blue-eyed woman smiling at Markl. He knew very well they didn't need cabbage or bread. If anything, they were going to Calcifer.

"Forgive me," Howl interjected. "But I don't think I introduced you to Markl, my adopted son. Markl, Anitchka. Anitchka, Markl."

Anitchka accepted the apprentice's blank face and curt 'hello.'

"The cabbage and bread cost money," Markl said, disregarding company. "And it's crowded too. I might get lost. You wouldn't want to lose your only child, _would you?_"

He wasn't one to act like a brat, but this Anitchka girl he did not like. Howl had been talking incessantly about her before he dropped the bomb that they were going to meet for tea at Café-au-Lait. Howl never mentioned the date excluded him.

"I handed you ten coins this morning before we departed!"

"I lost it."

"Lost it? I told you explicitly to keep it safe in case you got lost and needed to hitch a ride home!"

"I suppose I still have it…" Markl fished out a coin from his sock. Not that Howl was quick to anger, much less to anything concerning money, but it was always best to stay on the safe side.

"All right then, I'll see you after you return, but right now... Right now I'm…busy," Howl said for lack of a better word. He pushed Markl toward Blau's Fruits and Vegetables.

Markl wasn't ready to give up, and he dug his heels in. "That lady there looks like a cheek-pincher. I'd hate to have her cooing at me."

"Now you're just being silly," Howl remarked irritably. "No one is going to lay a finger on you. I apologize, Miss. This will on—"

"Look! She's pinching that baby's cheeks! I told you! That could be me next!"

"No, you look _here_. If I have to—"

"Oh, I won't mind if you follow," Anitchka said with a dimpled smile that made Howl weak at the knees. "I have children of my own and there are a few pushy fellows who they aren't too fond of."

_Children_. Howl blanched. "Ahhh… " The corners of his smile drooped. Markl grinned. There would be no snagging a maiden today. "I believe I gave you my house address?"

"Why yes. And I'm positively certain that my Horatio and Lilly will get along with Markl splendidly! You see, we've just moved in here from High Norland and they don't know many children so far."

Howl wilted as Anitchka opened her silk purse and scribbled her address on a pad for the wizard. "I have to leave soon but please don't hesitate to call. I'd be delighted if we could all meet sometime for a picnic and I'm sure you and my Horace will like each other. Ta-ta!" She waved goodbye and wriggled away in her heeled shoes.

"Come on, Howl." Markl pulled his deflated mentor behind him. "Let's go buy something from Cesari's, I'm sure that'll cheer you up!"

They made a rather odd looking pair as they hobbled down the streets together. From a block away, they could tell that Cesari's had their customers packed like sardines in a can. One man passed by the two, saying to his friend,"It's a bother to go in, but worth it if you get served by the new waitress."

"Aye, she's one pretty Miss. No doubt she'll find herself a nice young fellow soon."

Markl frowned. Again a chance for Howl to go dally with countless other women. Surely this new woman in the bakery wouldn't be married since Cesari's employed plenty of young women. It annoyed him to think that once a new woman came into Howl's crazy love life, he would be forgotten and left to his own devices until some great aunt or sensible relative cut ties between the two lovebirds.

"Never mind, there's too long a wait right now." Markl pulled Howl, who had now recovered, to a table outside of Cesari's shrouded by willows. Howl lowered their purchases as Markl observed the large houses and stores, all painted with warm crisscrossing strips. Many had balconies decorated dripping with pale flowered vines that hung from pots.

"It's been a long while since I've been here," said Markl. "But I'm positive that the sign down there is new." He pointed at a hulking sign which read 'Curios'.

Howl shaded his eyes with a hand. "You're right. How about giving it a look-see?"

The bell dinged upon their entrance, and a damp malodorous wave washed over them as the door shut. _Nothing more than a basement of old kitsch and dusty thingamabobs_, Markl thought with disappointment. Howl's inner shpper took over as he plucked one artisan vase after another before coming to a plain white doll stitched in black. A small heart was painted on its chest.

A clerk with rectangular spectacles wandered over to them, barely hitting the silver wind chime above. "That in your hands is a voodoo doll," the clerk remarked. "I'm afraid it's not for sale."

Howl raised his gaze. Black chignon, delicate face, high cheekbones – as lovely as Anitchka or Rita from last week. "I see. Why is it lying on this shelf then_?" Cast scintillating smile, check_.

The clerk's mouth opened, then clamped shut as fast as a clam. Markl cursed his idea. _Hardly a minute has passed and this lady is already swooning under his gaze!_

"So I can't bring one of these pretty dolls home with me? Does that go for you as well?"

"Howl, I know you're a fan of all sorts of useless trinkets, but _really_. I think you have one too many dress up dolls as it is," Markl said.

Howl briefly gave Markl a stern look as the clerk cocked a brow and removed the spectacles. Markl saw that Howl was not about to let down on his flirting.

"I sincerely apologize if this normally sweet child is getting on your nerves," Howl said, winking. "Please don't mind him. I must say, you have to most _dazzling_ eyes. Why ever would you mask them under those ghastly—"

Much to his embarrassment a small squeak spilled from his mouth as Markl pulled him out the exit by the wrists. A bell dinged them out, Howl's fading voice sputtering curses in Welsh.

"What an unusual pair," the clerk muttered. "That blonde one, _he—_Eh. Whatever suits him…" The forgotten voodoo doll on the carpet was plucked and seated next to a wndchime.

Few words were exchanged as the two returned to the castle, utterly worn out from walking. It was afternoon by then, and sunset was nearing. Howl lowered his purchases-apples and bundled kale rolling out of one bag-before shrugging off his crimson coat and tiredly made his way up the stairs. Markl was in his proper room when Howl cracked open the door for a chat.

"May I come in?" His tone was polite and padded inside without a nod or yes as permission anyway.

Dreamy light thinned across the floorboards where Markl sat with calves folded under his caterpillar-green shorts. A teetering tower of cards threatened to fall as Markl concentrated on dabbing his Queen of Hearts. It hovered at the top of the structure fleetingly before fluttering into a heap of black, white and red..

Howl strode in calmly, fixing himself a seat across the mess on the floor, much to Markl's dismay. He still wasn't in the mood for a pleasant talk. Soon after they had left the shop and Howl had tugged his wrist loose the two hadn't felt so comfortable with each other.

For quite a while Howl stacked his own card kingdom, three-by-three, without breaking a sweat. _He must have charmed the whole thing,_ Markl thought bitterly. By that time it had risen over Markl's head, maybe more. A glassy eye peered at Markl through a hole in the design. "Why so glum and abominable today?" Howl asked, taking care not to allow his affectionate sarcasm seep through.

"It's nothing," Markl retorted, still observing the ever-growing tower of cards. _Nearly skyscraper high!_ "It was just… Hot, that's all. I get crabby when I'm hot."

Howl threw his head back and laughed, the cards shaking dangerously as he did so. "So Anitchka and that woman in the Curios shop share no blame for your rotten mood. Did you fancy one of them or was it mere jealousy?"

"Of course I didn't fancy one of them. You can't even blame me for being jealous!"

"How so?"

"Can you honestly blame me if you ogle _every_ pretty girl on the street? You go from one pretty flower to the next like some egocentric bee! One girlfriend after another and not one of them lasts more than a week!"

"I would _not_ forget you! I might be a slither-outer and a terrible coward but I wouldn't ever be guilty of doing such a thing!"

Markl stuck his tongue. "The point is, I don't like you hanging around with a woman. Perhaps the clerk... Though I had to admit he was a bit of a spoilsport."

"Why her?" Howl's creation was nearly complete. "Does she meet your standards?"

Markl laughed. "I thought he was a woman, too, but then I noticed that he was wearing a suit, not a dress."

The stack of cards fell abruptly in a pile, revealing the entirety of Howl's flabbergasted face. Someone must have smacked him with a frying pan, the way he looked.

"You mean… But…but that whole time I was thinking... And I told him indirectly that he was _pretty _and if... I could take him home with..." Howl fell backwards, boneless, and hands covering his wails of embarrassment. "You should have _said_ something! _Warn_ me next time, _please_!"

"There, there, Howl," said Markl, patting his hair down motherly. _That'll put you out of business for quite a while!_

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><p><strong>Author Ramblings:<strong> Whew -.-" That took a lot out of me. I kinda like the whole idea of Howl as a father, but I haven't read much of it in the books between him and Morgan :/ Reviews appreciated :) Next chapter should be a short, quirky one on streaking. Maybe o-o"


	3. Apple Bottoms and Migraines

**Disclaimer: **If you think I own this fantastical movie or book, you are sadly mistaken ;-;

**A/N: **Every time I try writing a multi-chapter story, I get stuck at Chapter Two and never go back. _Finally!_

**Warnings: **As per usual, PWP. This whole darn fic is PWP *sigh* OOCness and some nudity ahead.

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><p>III<p>

_You have to be careful when dealing with a dirty little boy._

Howl recalled this piece of aunt-ily advice as he squatted to scan beneath the couch for a certain muddy munchkin who had been frolicking in the rain. _No sign,_ Howl thought, much to his chagrin. _Save for a few fluffy dust bunnies and that yattering yellowed skull. I really must clean up. Or hire a cleaning lady. That doesn't sound too bad, actually..._

"Don't look at me, I've no idea where he went!" Calficer exclaimed as Howl spun round to place the skull by the hearth. "That boy is craftier than he looks. Out, then in without so much as a trace of hair. Where are my logs, anyhow?"

"He was supposed to be retrieving some logs beneath the castle. The little demon is an escape artist! One moment I see him coming in with some damp logs, and the next I notice that he's drenched in mud, he's out of sight! Like a mouse!"

Howl shook his fist at the ceiling like the crabby geezer he swore he'd never become. "Whether or not you mark up the house, you're getting a bath, do you hear! I have ways of scouting out _tiny_ children so don't think you can fool me again!"

Still no answer.

_Bother._

Calcifer watched as Howl motioned a finger to his lips to place a spell on the stairs to the second floor. One that would absorb any noise, allowing him to stagger up craftily, not even the sound of dust hitting the floorboards.

In a way, the situation reminded Howl of when he was a child, back when he had begun to gain a snippet of interest in sorcery. He would seclude himself under the table of his mother's kitchen, a plethora of jars and bottles of mustard, pickles, lard. With all the tools he had scrounged together he would concoct "withard potionths"*** **his mother would sniff out within minutes.

"HOWELL!" she would yell, hitching the lair's walls—the chairs—apart and hastily fetching the soulful-eyed youngster from below the table. "Should I ever catch you brewing another of those ghastly sauces again, I'll send you to boarding school!"

A chuckle almost gave Howl away from his position between the bathroom and bedroom, but he clamped shut and honed in on the soft, nearby sounds of scuffling.

With another silencing jinx, he gingerly checked each bedroom. There were piles of baubles arranged higgledy-piggledy. With Markl barely surpassing his knee cap, Howl was _especially_ watchful. Heck, he even checked inside his cow plushie, just in case Markl hadn't learned how to shrink himself. Still no one.

_The boy **is** clever,_ Howl agreed. Not that he didn't think he was clever _already_, but... _Most children wouldn't **dream** of using reverse psychology when it comes to hiding from... Adults._ The 'F' word, 'D' word and any other word synonymous with 'male being which contributes to the DNA structure of a child or provides for a human in a parental manner' were banned from his lips. From his mind, not so much. He was still eagerly anticipating for that day to come.

_Got you._

A shock of auburn hair exposed Markl's hiding spot, located inside the empty hamper beside the sink. Howl dug him out of the hamper like a band-aid torn from a cut.

"_No!_ I don't want a shower, leave me alone!" Markl pleaded from besides Howl's waist. While Howl fixed the temperature of the bath, he held Markl glued to his hip with an arm.

"You're getting in whether you want to or you don't," said Howl over the thundering of rushing water. He allowed the tub to fill as he dropped Markl to the floor, kneeling to unbutton Markl's gooey green coat. Thankfully Howl didn't have his patchwork suit on or he would have been in an uproar since Markl's squirming was getting him devastatingly soiled.

"You must be some sort of dirt magnet," Howl coughed, scrubbing away at a splat of soil on his cheek. "I'm surprised you were only out for five minutes. Look what's happened to you! I'll have to go outside and fetch the logs once the rain has stopped," he muttered, grappling Markl as he attempted to unbutton his trousers next. "This wouldn't be so difficult if you weren't trying to flop about like a worm!"

"I'm not a child, I can bathe myself! And I'm _not_ tiny!"

"So you did hear that. I'm surprised that those socks you were hiding in didn't clog your ears."

He was still struggling to tear away at the shorts since his position allowed Markl more freedom to squirm. He finally managed to crack it, the shorts hitting the floor as Markl bolted for the door, stark-naked, making a bee-line for the stairs.

"Markl, where are you going, you—!"

Markl didn't hear the rest as he thundered down the steps and past the fire demon.

"The kid's finally lost it," Calcifer mumbled.

Above came the muffled shouts of Howl ordering Calcifer to stop the castle, from fear that Markl was heading straight out of the front door, which he was.

In no time, Markl had escaped and was _just_ about to make it across the hill, completely out of Howl's reach, when—

"Oof!"

"In a hurry for something, sweetheart?" a shaky, sugary voice asked him. "Too much in a hurry to put on your clothes, either," it added with a trembling chuckle.

Markl raised his eyes from the woolen lavender skirt he had plowed into, and into the withered, grinning face of the old woman he had seen briefly in the fish market.

"Kale Lady!" Markl exclaimed. Howl had finally reached them, his white blouse now stuck to his skin and blotched with raindrops and dirt, mud caked upon his shoes and trousers. He puffed to a stop and seized Markl in his arms, slinging him over a shoulder like a sack as he apologized to "Kale Lady." It seemed that he had been doing a lot of apologizing lately since acquiring his son...

As they walked back, Howl was surprisingly cheerful.

"This time I'm making sure to lock every door, window, and mouse hole! My aunt warned my mother about this sort of thing—can you imagine being my Aunt and having_ six _naked kids crashing into each other in the streets and causing havoc? And I can barely keep tabs on _one_!"

The blabbering continued as they to the castle, a gloomy Markl grudgingly accepting the ride back home. Cold spring air wafting over his bare bottom, chilling him to the bone.

When they returned, Markl had latched onto Howl like a kitten. Still Howl managed to deposit the moping child into the happily steaming tub.

"I should hope I won't need to resort to a binding spell this time around," Howl remarked, squeezing a glop of glossy pink substance on his palms and rubbing it into Markl's wavy hair.

"Ouch! You'll make all my hair fall out like that." Fingers kneaded his scalp, emitting a delightful aroma of honeysuckle and lavender. "I'm going to smell like a girl after this..."

"Quiet. This is must be the best clean-up you've had in ages. I should have known better than to let you bathe yourself." Thick suds cascaded down Markl's shoulders and continued to slide down into the tarnishing water as Howl laved his hair. "And ayway, who wouldn't like to smell like me?" He sculpted Markl's hair into a unicorn horn, then plucked up a bar of soap.

"Wait…what did you do to my hair?" A suspicious hand drifted toward his forehead, where the 'do protruded, but were snatch away as Howl proceeded to lave his arms.

"Nothing-nothing! You're just looking amazing is all."

Once done, Howl had Markl twirl below the shower head which was pelting down water in slaps. When he was absolutely certain that Markl was squeaky clean, he drained the tub and let Markl stand shivering in the wizard's sequined bathrobe.

"W-w-where a-are my c-clothes?"

Howl nodded to the nightgown draped over a chair. Without further ado, Markl dressed himself, still waiting upon Howl to walk him upstairs.

"I'll be a while before I get out. Roots sprouting up again," Howl grumbled as he finished off his cleaning.

"You mean your hair?"

Markl hadn't given much thought to Howl's hair besides the countless, agonizing hours Howl spent each week with his chemicals and cosmetic spells as company. Actually, he hadn't given much thought to those either. To him, they were just another extension of Howl's studies.

"You know, if you were as insistent on getting me washed as you were on maintaining this house, we wouldn't be in the midst of such disaster," Markl deadpanned, sweeping his eyes over Howl's many grooming instruments. Markl backed himself by the door, his legs hugged to his chest in a failed attempt to rid himself of the shivers. Oh, how warm it had been in that bath…

"Still cold?" Howl asked sympathetically from over his shoulder. He had just torn off his blouse and dropped it on the floor as a sort of mat, revealing the stretching and relaxing of his muscles as he unfastened his studded leather belt. Markl nodded, not really seeing his Master undressing. _He really is like a mouse,_ Howl thought affectionately, suddenly wanting to pinch Markl's cheeks.

"C-can I g-get another sh-shower, p-pl-please?"

Howl blinked. The request going over his pretty little head.

"You would like a shower _now_?

Markl nodded, his limp locks bouncing across his forehead. "I don't feel like going downstairs since Calcifer must have seen me. Plus! What if snail eggs got into my hair or my ears!"

Howl felt defeated.**_ Now_**_ he's worried about the brazen little show he had put on. Children are certainly foreign little creatures..._ He squeaked the faucet shut. "All right, but you're bathing yourself." He lifted Markl, who had already disrobed himself, by his armpits and heaved him into the tub. The water came up to Markl's chin.

"You've been taking all the nice baths for yourself!" Markl accused, with a bit of a gurgle as water flooded his mouth. "You even added _bubbles_! If I'd known you would do this, I wouldn't have run off!"

"That reminds me. Why_ did_ you do that?" Howl dropped a foot into the water, undergarments left on for Markl's sake, and hoisted himself in_. I really do deserve this bath,_ he thought, easily sliding in. Fortunately the tub was big enough for them to share.

"I- Nggh!"

Howl's eyes snapped open upon hearing a gurgle from Markl and the sound of heavy splashing. A torrent of bottles were attacking; Markl having grabbed frantically for the shelf when Howl's weight had added another five inches to the water, raising the level above Markl's head. In no time Markl was latched onto his father like a barnacle. Streams of blues, lilacs, and oranges bled across the water's surface.

Howl watched with horror at his beloved hair care products after tearing Markl from his chest and onto the edge of the tub. "You…You…"

"Howl, look at my arm! It's _blue_! And look, my fingers are purple!" Markl shrieked, admiring the tinges of color on his skin. He immediately checked his hair and feet for any signs of pigment. "…Howl?"

Howl shut his eyes and groaned, melting away under the water, surrounded by suicidal bottles, splotches of mud and ink. He recalled another of his aunts old sayings_: There are many things you can learn from children. How much patience you have, for instance._

**Author Ramblings: **Ugh... e.e Ending doesn't make much sense, but it did when I wrote it. No quick(-ish) updates in a while for several reasons: My Spanish teacher hates us all, I have another fic to work on, I'm expected to show up at cross-country practice, and the book I need so desperately for the next chapter is lost ._. Argh, and I hate Writer's Block. Work, brain, work! =3= My brain says he'll be back once his vacation to Honolulu is over.

"withard potionths"** *-** In House of Many Ways, Howl disguises himself as a six-year-old child with a lisp. Just felt like adding it in there; it was adorable xD


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